Liars

The wife and I were watching a show on television last night about oil consumption. The show was a “what if” scenario and was portrayed as if it were a report on something that actually happened. The scenario was that oil scarcity had led to prices that were so high, it brought our economy to a halt. It showed airlines shutting down and people moving out of suburban neighborhoods so they could live closer to the city and depend less on their cars. People were “interviewed” about what had happened to their lives as a result of the oil shortage.

Once we realized what was going on, the wife said, “so this didn’t really happen. That kid being ‘interviewed’ is just lying to us.”

So, that’s another word for an actor: a liar.

We had a good laugh over that one.

Your Daddy Don’t Know

The New Pornographers covered a song by the forgotten 80’s band, Toronto, called “Your Daddy Don’t Know” for a movie called Fubar. They also did a video for the song and it cracks my shit up.

It has all of the best cheesy 80’s video elements: god awful clothes/hats, teased hair, mustaches/beards, inane back story, cheesy band studio performances, even a fat guy in a cape with white clown makeup. Here are some stills from the video:

Neko’s teased hair

Neko Case

Carl Newman looks hilarious

Check out Carl Newman's outfit and wig!

Neko doing her best Stevie Nicks

Neko Case doing her best Stevie Nicks

Creepy 80’s video guys

Creepy Guys

I must say, they did a really good job recording this song and Neko Case sings her ass off. Trust me, you’re going to love this.

The New Pornographers – Your Daddy Don’t Know (quicktime)

(via Chromewaves)

Bar Etiquette 101

How To Get Served A Good Drink Quickly Even When It’s Busy

This list of drink ordering Do’s and Don’ts is fucking hilarious. Here’s one of my favorite Don’ts:

Be “The Microbrew Aficionado”
Usually a pseudo-hippy who can’t tip a quarter but can’t bring himself to drink “schwag,” and who has to sample some new berry-wheat-harvest-ale that he heard about at Burning Man. “Do you have the new Vernal-Equinox Special Welcome-Fest?” “Does Anyone?” Here’s your Newcastle. Go.

Watched Over by a Full Moon

My band, Luigi, is recording a new album. This past weekend was spent in a windowless recording studio mixing down some tracks. We’re extremely happy with the results.

As I headed into the studio on Saturday, I couldn’t help but notice this huge billboard situated on top of the building right next to our studio. It’s a PETA ad featuring David Cross. I had to take a picture of it with my camera phone because David Cross’ ass literally watched over us all weekend as we worked on our album.

Michelle, our singer, went on tour with David Cross a few years ago with her previous band Ultrababyfat, so it’s kind of appropriate. Appropriate and hilarious.

David Cross' Ass

Apropos

The other night, while working out on the treadmill at the YMCA, the perfect song came on my iPod. Picturing all of us furiously working out as these lyrics echoed through my headphones brought a smile to my face.

Talkin’ Bout The Smiling Deathporn Immortality Blues (everyone wants to live forever)
The Flaming Lips (Hit To Death In The Future Head)

Imagination, that’s the way that it seems
Man can only live in his dreams
Oh, it seems so hard.
If I’ve lived a thousand times before
And if I’m gonna live a million more
Always brings me down

Everyone wants to live forever
Thinkin’ that it’d be a lot better
Everyone wants to live for ever, whoah

The feeling in my head starts heading south
It seems it stops the fever from shootin’ out of my mouth
Life gushing all around

Everyone wants to live forever
Thinkin’ that it’d be a lot better
Everyone wants to live forever, whoah oh oo ohhh

Baby Shower Drunks

The wife and I had a busy, but fun weekend hosting a baby shower for our friends Johnny and Darolyn. It wasn’t a traditional baby shower, since we had a keg. I guess something about an impending birth makes people really excited (and thirsty for beer).

It inspired me to write a haiku:

baby shower drunks
decide to talk politics
later feel stupid

Parisian Cave Dwelling Cinema Lovers

Okay, this gets my vote for most interesting story I read today:

Police in Paris have discovered a fully equipped cinema-cum-restaurant in a large and previously uncharted cavern underneath the capital’s chic 16th arrondissement.

Make sure you read the whole article so you can get to the part where a group identifying itself as the “Perforating Mexicans” takes credit for the whole thing.

The Perforating Mexicans. That’s sooo the name of my next band.